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Saturday 2 January 2010
Tuesday 29 December 2009
Very Bad Accident
A hunter was out enjoying a nice morning in the woods when he decided to take a leak. He walked over to a tree and propped up his gun. Just then a gust of wind blew, the gun fell over, and discharged ... shooting him in the genitals.
Several hours later, lying in a hospital bed, he was approached by his doctor, who said, "Well sir, I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that you are going to be OK. The damage was local to your groin, there was very little internal damage and we were able to remove all of the buckshot."
"What's the bad news?" asked the hunter.
"The bad news is that there was some pretty extensive buckshot damage done to your penis. I'm going to have to refer you to my sister."
"Well I guess that isn't too bad," the hunter replied. "Is your sister a plastic surgeon?"
"Not exactly." answered the doctor. "She's a flute player in the Chicago Symphony. She's going to teach you where to put your fingers so you don't piss in your eyes!"
Several hours later, lying in a hospital bed, he was approached by his doctor, who said, "Well sir, I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that you are going to be OK. The damage was local to your groin, there was very little internal damage and we were able to remove all of the buckshot."
"What's the bad news?" asked the hunter.
"The bad news is that there was some pretty extensive buckshot damage done to your penis. I'm going to have to refer you to my sister."
"Well I guess that isn't too bad," the hunter replied. "Is your sister a plastic surgeon?"
"Not exactly." answered the doctor. "She's a flute player in the Chicago Symphony. She's going to teach you where to put your fingers so you don't piss in your eyes!"
Saturday 26 December 2009
Christmast According to Psychiatric Patients
Christmast is over, how'd you spend your time? Was it happy, boring, or sad day?
We've surveyed some psychiatric patient what they think about christmast, and we've got some funny answers:
1. Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?
2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Kings Disoriented Are
3. Dementia --- I Think I'll be Home for Christmas
4. Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me
5. Homicidal --- Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer and I was Driving....
6. Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Town to Get Me
7. Depressed --- Blue Christmas & I saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus
8. Personality Disorder --- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why
9. Attention Deficit Disorder --- Silent night, Holy oooh look at the froggy, can I have a chocolate, why is France so far away?
10. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder --- Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
We've surveyed some psychiatric patient what they think about christmast, and we've got some funny answers:
1. Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?
2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Kings Disoriented Are
3. Dementia --- I Think I'll be Home for Christmas
4. Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me
5. Homicidal --- Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer and I was Driving....
6. Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Town to Get Me
7. Depressed --- Blue Christmas & I saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus
8. Personality Disorder --- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why
9. Attention Deficit Disorder --- Silent night, Holy oooh look at the froggy, can I have a chocolate, why is France so far away?
10. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder --- Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Thursday 24 December 2009
Merry Christmast! It's Time for Santa Claus to Have Fun!
Merry Christmast for all of you! How is your Christmast eve? Did Santa Clause visited you & gave a present?
It's been a busy week for Santa Claus, and after spending last night dropping present to people all around the world, now it's time for having fun! And the old man knows how to enjoying life much than we do. He's very old and experienced tough...
It's been a busy week for Santa Claus, and after spending last night dropping present to people all around the world, now it's time for having fun! And the old man knows how to enjoying life much than we do. He's very old and experienced tough...
Tuesday 22 December 2009
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